From “How Will You Measure Your Life?” by Clayton M. Christensen, James Allworth, and Karen Dillon
This may sound counterintuitive, but I deeply believe that the path to happiness in a relationship is not just about finding someone who you think is going to make you happy. Rather, the reverse is equally true: the path to happiness is about finding someone who you want to make happy, someone whose happiness is worth devoting yourself to. If what causes us to fall deeply in love is mutually understanding and them doing each other’s job to be done, then I have observed that what cements that commitment is the extent to which I sacrifice myself to help her succeed and for her to be happy.
This principle – that sacrifice deepens our commitment – doesn’t just work in marriages. It applies to members of our family and close friends, as well as organizations and even cultures and nations.